21 Signs That You’re an INFJ, the Rarest Personality Type

IntrovertDear.com INFJ signs

The INFJ personality type can be quirky, complicated, and sometimes downright contradictory. How do you know if you’re an INFJ, the rarest of the 16 Myers-Briggs personality types? If you relate to most of these 21 signs, the answer just might be yes.

Signs That You’re an INFJ

1. From a young age, you felt different from the people around you. Even if you had plenty of friends, you never felt like you truly fit in. Sometimes you faked being more like them so they would accept you. This is normal for an INFJ, because we need a sense of community and harmony with those around us.

2. You want to know what’s REALLY going on in people’s lives, not just trivial stuff like what they did this weekend or what they bought on their latest shopping trip. You want to dig deep and get at the things that no one else sees. What does the person in front of you really think? How does this person really feel? The fake facade they put up for other people doesn’t fool you.

3. You feel more comfortable having a loose plan for things than you do completely winging it.

4. You can be both incredibly shy, quiet, and withdrawn, as well as charming, fun, and hilarious. For an INFJ, it’s all about the situation, your mood, and energy levels—and most importantly, the people you’re with.

5. When someone comes to you with a problem, you usually don’t give them advice or your opinion unless they ask. Instead, you ask them questions to help them better understand the situation and their own feelings about it. Sometimes you tell a story of a time when something similar happened to you, in the hope that they’ll draw their own lesson. You feel like you can usually see the path they should take, but you don’t want them to do it just because you told them to — you want it to be their decision. (This is why INFJs are often considered natural advice-givers and counsellors.)

6. You are an introvert and you like alone time, but you can’t be alone for too long. Eventually you need to reunite with your people. “Your people” are a handful of good friends who truly “get” you. Deep conversations with these people are priceless, and hanging out with them can actually boost your energy.

7. You’ve been known to suddenly cut people out of your life when they’ve hurt you one too many times. It’s not that you enjoy cutting people out, rather, you do this simply to protect yourself. Even though you may look like you have it together on the outside, you’re extremely sensitive inwardly, and you’re especially sensitive to other people’s words and actions.

8. Sometimes you try so hard to make other people happy that you forget to make yourself happy. (This is one of the biggest problems and INFJ struggles to overcome.)

9. You often feel like you see precisely what someone else is feeling, and you believe you know what they need deep down. You’re not always right, but you tend to be more perceptive than most.

10. You feel like you’re destined for so much more than just dragging yourself to your 9-5 job to pay the bills. You want to help people and change the world — not just get a paycheck. The problem is you either don’t know what your “glorious purpose” is, or you have an inkling, but you don’t know how to achieve it.

11. You almost always have this sinking feeling like you could be doing better with your life. This results in you constantly have secret self-improvement projects going on, like learning how to cook healthy meals, setting better boundaries, or getting better at articulating yourself. Sometimes you push yourself too hard as you attempt to achieve your “perfect” life.

12. Sometimes you turn to people-pleasing to protect yourself. You’re sensitive, so you can get really bothered when someone criticizes you or is disappointed in you. They can’t criticize you if you make them happy.

13. You often immediately sense the mood of a room when you walk into it. Likewise, you often absorb the feelings of the people around you. If they’re excited, you get excited. If they’re anxious, you get anxious, too. You tend to gravitate toward calm, centered people so you don’t have to deal with as much emotional garbage.

14. You’re drawn to high-quality things, like good food, nice clothes, and anything else that has good craftsmanship. As much as you hate to admit it, the way things look is important to you. You like being surrounded by beauty, and you tend to have sophisticated, refined tastes. But you’re a minimalist at heart. You’d rather have one or two really nice shirts than ten mediocre ones.

15. You care deeply about the people in your life, but they’ll probably never know just how much you care, because you keep your feelings mostly to yourself. You can have trouble articulating your emotions, even though you feel them intensely. (When an INFJ falls for someone, we fall hard.)

16. You’re usually thoughtful, conscientious, and considerate. Other people who are not as conscientious can seem callous and even cruel.

17. You love learning, especially when it comes to psychology, self-improvement, spirituality, and certain sciences.

18. When everyone else is gossiping, discussing celebs, or talking about other trivial things, you often find yourself thinking about outer space, time travel, human nature, the meaning of life, and other more epic topics. You rarely try to steer the conversation in that direction, though, because you don’t think other people will be interested.

19. You feel compelled to get things done. You often write to-do lists, and you enjoy checking things off them. If you don’t have a goal to work toward, after a while, you feel lost and bored.

20. When you’re passionate about something, it feels like nothing can stand in your way. The INFJ motto is, “The impossible takes just a little bit longer.”

21. Other people see you as wise, insightful, and almost spiritual. They often come to you for advice and emotional support. You relish your role as the “wise one,” and you like being needed. But sometimes it becomes too much. You’re an introvert, for crying out loud, and sometimes you just wish everyone would solve their own problems and leave you alone for a while.

Are you an INFJ?

Some of these signs are things a lot of people will identify with, and every INFJ is going to be a little different. If you can relate to most of them, however, chances are good that you’re an INFJ. Want to be 100% sure? There’s an easy way to find out: take this free personality assessment from our partner site and see your personality type in minutes. 

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Read this: 12 Things INFJs Absolutely Need to Be Happy 

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  • Ammar Helimi says:


  • Heidi says:

    Every. last. one. Nailed it.

  • Cornelia Andersson says:

    Right on spot in every way!

  • Karilisa says:

    Yep! Thank you for explaining myself to me 🙂

  • This describes me perfectly. I was cheering and nodding to every. Single. Point. I’m glad websites like these exist now.

  • njguy54 says:

    Pretty much on point. The only difference in my case is #7. I’ve tended to stick with people much longer than I should, even after the relationship becomes unhealthy for the both of us.

  • IBikeNYC says:

    Very much me, especially #14.

    I’d never thought to attribute these kinds of traits and habits to my introversion. This post is validating in so many ways. Thank you!

  • Janina Oakley says:

    This actually released tears. I am so glad this information is out there now; such a help for all of us who always knew we never “fit”, but never knew why. Thank you.

  • Lynda Carter says:

    #5 for sure, but all of them ring true!

  • Pratikshya Mishra says:

    very very true.. each and every single point…

  • Cactus Horizon says:

    I feel like this list reads like a horoscope and could almost match anyone……

  • Deepak says:

    Right till the last point. Can’t really understand why the world become so methodical now. Like every INFJ have these things in common now. But their tastes differ in some areas.

  • The emotions part seems off, in regards to not voicing them. I keep reading how infj is emotionally extroverted, wanting to talk about those things, to help others. I’m sure there’s a flipside, we are still introverts lol.

  • Agusta Fridfinnsdottir says:

    Description af ME <3

  • Lou says:

    #7 cutting people out of my life for my own protection…YES! I unfortunately am going through that now. It’s so painful, but I had to do it or I would wither up. Perfect list….all true!!

  • Vishal Bheeroo says:

    Enjoyed reading this post about different personality and many times, we have so many traits not just one!

  • Hazel Vu says:

    Every single point is like slashing through my mind and heart!! Especially #15 🙁 sad but true, i wonder if there is a way for us to overcome that…

  • Nehemiah Joel Williams says:

    This was amazingly well articulated and accurate on so many levels. Thanks for writing this!

  • Samantha Budhu says:

    Thank you, this describes me so accurately, no doubt about it (INFJ)

  • JBalogun says:

    This is so on point, chuckled to a few.

  • Fedor Amuricano says:

    Thats too much for a day

  • Darlene Reilley says:

    Yes! Some are scarily true…and others are just true. INFJ has positives and problems…just like everyone else. #9 is so right…and sometimes you realize things that other people don’t realize about themselves. Love the post!

  • Ann Roy says:

    I cried actual tears of happiness after reading this
    Now I know there are other people like me out there :”)
    thought I was the awkward and the odd one

  • Marie Nolan Liston says:

    Yes. Yes. Yes. Each of these are spot on. Thank you for making me not feel like the only one!

  • Number 14 was what decided this for me. And all this time I thought I was INFP as I don’t like to be “boxed in” by schedules!

    • Lauren Teresa Smith says:

      That’s understandable. I thought I was INFP too.

    • Transbutter says:

      14 did it for me too!

    • Marley2993 says:

      You’re probably still an INFP because 14 has nothing to do with schedules; it’s about particular tastes. An authentic INFJ would have corrected themselves immediately, had they have seen the error, and not left this flaw on the Internet for 7 months.

      • Donna Gosdantian says:

        Marley2993 Obviously. your snarky comment shows that you have the traits of AAUD personality type. You’ve never heard of this particular personality type ? Well I guess, most people are considerate, and probably wouldn’t tell you to your face what, group your personality most aligns with. I’m not like most people, so I’ll tell you, straight up what your personality acronym stands for, AAUD, means that you’re an Arrogant And Unapologetic Dick. For a bonus, I’ll throw this into the mix, you’re an insecure AAUD, trying to prove a falsehood. Could it be, the lie, that you have a higher intellectual capability, than most people ?. I’m writing this because, you’re just a snarky bully. And in my opinion,Snarky Bullies really do suck.

        • Nor Theman says:

          trying to prove a falsehood ? the person stated a fact and YOU are trying to rhetorically downsize em only cause you’re jealous of them being one of 1% rare personnalities ?

    • 방 탄 소 년 단 페 물 달 린 앞 디' says:

      Same.. I thought I’m an INFP too but 1,7,8,10,12,14,15,17 & 18 is srsly me, esp 18. My workmates said I’m weird, I’m always talking bout aliens, time travelers, bermuda triangle, geography and history..

    • Nya Assis says:

      I bet you that there are many INFJs that pose as an INFP. #14 did me in because when I was little my aunt teased me and called me 5 star so I lived my life after that proving that I was not and tried to take this modest and meek route because I was sensitive to her teasing. She would tell me to make sure that whatever I do in life make sure that it makes A LOT of money because you only like high quality things. I am every single thing in this list but #14 did me in. I’m done posing LOL!

    • Maria Polyzoi says:

      Me too and finally I understood I am actually an INFJ

  • Nessie says:

    Spot on.

  • Alanna Jane says:

    Every. Single. One!

  • Janice Cochran says:

    This is actually spot on for me too. Every single one of them.

  • Lauren Teresa Smith says:

    Is it possible to have an INFJ childhood, INFP adulthood (to please others), but mostly being an INFJ? I’m learning though to accept and embrace the natural INFJ that I am creatively and uniquely no matter what people will say & try doing. We have a voice just as important as anyone else.

    • Olivia Johnson says:

      I think this is me as well.

    • Jennifer says:

      I am an INTJ but when I was younger I acted like an INFJ because it was easier, and my parents tried to change me (become ESFJ).
      I was confused (it was unconscious), then I read about the types and discovered (not only by results along the 5 years) why I was getting so tired and disappointed.
      People wear social masks, and some of them forget to take them out. If you embrace who you’re , people will complain, but it’s your life and you have to be your best version. It’s the only way to do unique things.

      • AJ Moore says:

        INFJs have the ability to mimic all the other 15 types. No other type can do this. So it’s easy that an INFJ can bounce around between types. My first test came out ENFJ. Because INFJs have the ability to be extroverted. But all my later retakes have been INFJ and one INTJ. Its important to look at the percentages. My ENFJ test was only extroverted by 1% meaning i probably was feeling extroverted that day. Because we seem extroverted when we are with are approved people.

        • Anastasiya says:

          I totslly agree!! Like 100%. Literally, 6-7 years ago when I first took the test I ended up being extroverted by around 25-30% or so (and the overall was ENFJ). I always thought of myself as an introvert beforehand that’s why I was a bit shocked to discover that I was an extrovert. Few years later, I took this test once again and got around 1-2% of an extrovert (which is an ambivert) which I wasn’t so surprised about as by that time I knew I could switch between both and I considered the results pretty accurate (still getting an ENFJ personality type). And only today I took the test with my friend, just out of curiosity and got INFJ. I asked myself if it’s actually possible for a person to have their type of personality change over time, but after reading on this mostly everything that internet offers (haha) I realised that it’s not even 100, it’s 200% me. Which is super weird, as according to my previous test results I always thought I was someone else 🙂

  • 阿部ちゃんの妻です😘 says:

    I’m supposed to be INFP and a strong Fi-Ne user but why all of this relates so much to me?

  • 阿部ちゃんの妻です😘 says:

    I seriously think this was written by an INFP who were mistyped as INFJ. After all, INFP is commonly mistyped as INFJ

    • Hyeyun Han says:

      I was thinking the same thing haha I think this is more of an INF thing rather than INFJs in particular.. I’m and infp and I relate to most of it.

  • Ash says:

    This is so dead on!

  • Totally spot on!! I’m fully INFJ and this article just basically summed me up haha 😂

  • Kerri Jean says:

    Yes, yes, and yes.

  • gwenusian says:

    Can anyone here tell me what career paths they have settled into as I am so lost right now. I’m unhappy, nervous and angry with myself because I can’t find something that will work for me.

    • Graphic and Web Design and more recently just added on fullstack web development as well! If I weren’t doing those, I think I’d opt for Interior Design, or maybe something with Chemistry in use or fulltime blogging

    • Same.

      I always wanted to travel and then blog about it. A travel blogger! I’ve always thought that learning about how humans interact with one another, or learning about different cultures, etc… would be interesting and fun. I regret not taking up a Social Science degree. But, I’m sure I could never afford having a job like that. Being an adult with responsibilities is so unfair sometimes. Haha.

      I also wanted to always open up a bakery/coffee shop. I have all of these fun ideas in the back of my mind…stored away…just in case it should ever happen.

      Or…at one time, I thought that I’d like to become a writer. That is until my English II teacher told me that my writing was like “verbarrhea.” I never did finish that class.

      Ugh. INFJ’s can also be so indecisive. Am I right? 🙂

      • IBikeNYC says:

        Why do you think that English II teacher was right?????

      • Melinda Lindor says:

        Right, we are very indecisive but, you can do anything you want to do. Dream away. Only one life to live, you were put here to be happy. Think, “What would I love?” & get to it!

    • njguy54 says:

      I started out in the ’80s as a a technical writer and advertising copywriter; if you’re interested in writing, those are obvious choices, though they don’t always pay well (unless you’re a freelancer, which has its own set of challenges). When the Web became a thing, I got into web design, and from there into other aspects of IT.

      As with writing, a lot of IT work gives you the opportunity to research, solve problems and be creative. Much of the work is collaborative, although much also allows you to work alone. There are many kinds of jobs in the IT realm, of which coding is just one. Organizations with strong IT components (and they are increasing every day) need business analysts and architects, tech writers, database and system administrators, information security specialists, data analysts, graphic designers, social media experts, user experience (UX) designers, testers, project managers, trainers and strategists. Aside from the scope and variety of work, IT is a growing field that pays very well.

    • Heidi Wright says:

      have just finished a psychology degree but now am looking into going into nutrition 🙂 also trying to start up a lifestyle blog talking about wellbeing and travel. I always doubt myself though and aren’t quite sure what my purpose is, don’t worry, the right thing might find you 🙂

    • Koby Duncan says:

      I was a nurse and got so emotionally burnt out. I didn’t realise at the time, but I was constantly absorbing other people’s energies and it got to me. I’m starting a graphic design course soon.

    • PatM says:

      I’m a graphic design too, Had a business for 25 years.
      I always feel comfortable around creative people, like I’m home.
      But I am also so, so practical, peace maker, hate conflict. I feel like I’m a contradiction.

      • Gloria says:

        You sound like me. I’m also both creative & practical ( & I hate conflict). I’m also a graphic & web designer.

        I can be so logical, but I’m also very much a feeling person. I’ve always felt like a contradiction. I’ve always known that I’m different.

    • Alpina88 says:

      Journalism. It’s not always ideal as I do have to be “on” a lot of the time and speak to many people, but I also get to write and I enjoy that.

    • FRR III says:

      I am an infj and I have decided on nursing. After learning about infj’s I realized how well it fits my personality and probably why I gravitated towards this career. Nurses are patient advocates and something that makes an infj tick is advocating for people who can’t speak for themselves. I truly enjoy helping people on such an intimate level so it is a very saitisfying career. It’s been a lot of hard work but I’ve never minded working hard for something I want. Good luck in your endeveors!

    • Shar says:

      I went into Graphic Design in college and am now a UX Designer – marries my love of focusing on making great user/customer experiences and design 🙂

      • Tim Perry says:

        THIS! UX design is an amazing fit for the INFJ. I studied engineering and now run an architectural acoustics business, but I worked briefly as a UX designer. It was the most fascinating and natural fit for me. I loved it, and I was naturally good at it.

        I highly encourage any INFJ to read the books “Don’t Make Me Think” and “Universal Principles of Design”. Design thinking is one of the secret areas where the INFJ can truly excel and be deeply fulfilled. Industrial design, UX design, urban design — these fields let the INFJ indulge their empathy, LEVERAGE their talents to benefit many people, and see the results of their work impact people in positive ways.

        We live in a society filled with bad design. E.g., cities are designed around the car instead of the human, making the path of least resistance driving. This encourages people to develop unhealthy, unsustainable habits. Good design accepts that people are lazy and irrational, and seeks to create a path of least resistance that guides people into healthy, productive, benevolent outcomes.

        My adventures into UX design helped me discover that design is my core passion. I think many INFJs are not even aware this field exists, which is a shame, because it’s a perfect fit. Humanity needs more INFJ designers.

    • Melinda Lindor says:

      I’m a Registered Nurse! Big mistake! I’m going into coaching because I love the work, but what am I suppose to do on my off days 😐.

    • Charlie Harwood says:

      i’m training to be a midwife 🙂

    • karen w says:

      I started out in counselling and burned out after about 5 years. I wasn’t big on self-care back then. I have just trained as a wellness coach and it is similar enough to counselling but has a definite beginning and end (which INFJs also like). My own journey to self-care took me on a path to helping others.

    • Lily says:

      I’m still in high school but I’m really interested in Sciences like psychology and also community service/health jobs where i can help others. I think they’d be such fulfilling jobs

    • Clyde Seeger says:

      Tarot Card reader.

    • Claire Castles says:

      I work in Student Support in Higher Education. I’m not a counsellor but I support students 1:1 with complex personal circumstances to get the support they need to help them engage with their course. Particular focus on students from backgrounds who are more likely to face barriers entering and staying at University. I also do some project work/research on ways to make student experience more fair and inclusive.I really enjoy helping people 1:1 but the “big picture” part of my job is really what drives me. That’s how I know I’m an INFJ. I become extremely frustrated when I see problems and injustices in systems which I feel powerless to change.

    • norcalpat says:

      I had the same problem and worked as a buyer, then a customer service manager, and finally ending up in graphic design. My last boss thought I could do anything because by the time I worked for her I had. I think if I had planned my career I wouldn’t have been able to stick it out because I get bored and need to make a change every 4 years or so. I ended up getting bored with graphic design and taught myself how to code. So, now I do web design. I’m nearly 4 years in and can feel the boredom setting in. It’s time to do something else. Sometimes a career isn’t the right choice, doing what you want to do until you don’t want to do it anymore works out better. It has for me.

    • Mr Truth says:

      Lean Operational Exellence . . . in which I get to use my creativity on projects, work cell redesign, interaction with hourly workers . . graphic design ( like Marissa and Shae ) . . and technical writing.

  • lahav calev says:

    Good article, thank you. I have difficulty’s finding a therapist who will “dig” me. Maybe The INFJ is causing that ? I’m not sure. Maybe it’s just me. Need to keep on searching..

  • Olivia Johnson says:

    Spot on.

  • Milka says:

    So spot on,


    Exactly the way I think👏 thanks , before I used 2 ask myself why I m so different?is it just me? Nd many questions but now I now😊

  • JaseR75 says:

    Yes! Almost everyone of these applies to me. The first one, really hit home.

  • Sally Marie says:

    Most accurate list ever, every single item.

  • Heidi Wright says:

    I have just finished a psychology degree but now am looking into going into nutrition 🙂 also trying to start up a lifestyle blog talking about wellbeing and travel. I always doubt myself though and aren’t quite sure what my purpose is, don’t worry, the right thing might find you 🙂

  • Kay Dirling says:

    So much truth. #11 and #15 in particular hit close to home.

  • Shauna says:

    This was so relatable that I actually almost cried. It’s like I finally feel like there’s a definition for the way that I am, and it’s awesome to know that I’m not the only one.

  • Nessie says:

    Many if not most of these characteristics are shared by other introverted personalities as well. That’s one more reason why people should be very careful not to mistype themselves in a moment of ‘enthusiasm’.

  • Nessie says:

    People quit believing you’re the ‘only one’ who does this and that..seriously that sounds pretty arrogant and ridiculous. There are 7+ billions of people in the world..surely you don’t all think that you’re so ‘rare’ and ‘special’ that nobody else shares something you do, right?

    • Monique A. Williams says:

      When you represent < 1% of the population, it's easy to feel misunderstood in your little corner of the world. Perhaps you don't understand because you find common ground everywhere you step. Many of us cannot relate to being so thoroughly average.

  • Michelle Winifred says:

    Wow. This is totally me. And it feels good to know that I’m not alone. I thought I was a total weirdo who would never fit in anywhere 😅 Thank you so much for this post!!

  • Rozarrianne says:

    I am an INFJ and none of these are wrong.

  • Eliz Matez says:

    The descriptions so totally match my personality!
    To even find #18 and #10 on the list surprised me, though 🙂

  • vanessa says:

    As an INFJ I felt all of these signs. I would often question myself, “why are they talking so much like love relations, current happenings around them and trivial topics that’s how a lot of my friends get along so well, it’s great how they can talk for hours like that but most of what they talk about doesn’t pique my interest at all. What I wanted is a real talk about art, life, and how the world works but majority of my friends doesn’t get what I talk about or is not interested because it’s too deep and they just want a casual talk. So I look like a fish out of water most of the time. I wish I can talk like them.

    • Chris says:

      You just need to find people with inclinations which gravitate them away from mundane conversation. Biggest mistake an INFJ can make is wishing that they weren’t themselves. Firstly it isn’t possible, and secondly our personality type is incredibly unique. Be proud of who you are.

  • tinykingkong says:

    i think i will die without knowing my type

  • Yrwyfyn Ddimbyd says:

    OMG get out of my head!!!

  • Indrani says:

    I can’t describe how I’m feeling. It’s almost as if someone just read all the things that go on in my head.

  • Jhana Snowden says:

    I never faked anything nor do I write to-do-lists. Everything else completes the sunny side of my INFJ status, however, I’m missing all of the shady sides put into print here.

  • Kady says:

    I test right on the line between infp and infj. This list is me, every one.
    Then I read the comment by someone who thinks that this lIst actually describes infp. Oh brother. The mystery continues.

  • Monsieur Jonathan Augustin says:

    I thought the Myer-Briggs test was just some pseudo-intellectual horoscope, but this is pretty spot on! Like REALLY accurate!

  • lola says:

    yes, yes, yes to each one!!!!!! Esp today, #21. Please, people figure your stuff out yourselves!!

  • Starah says:

    Um. Is it cos I took the test? That usually tells me that I’m INFJ.

  • Chris says:

    Or it describes you to an F, rather. 😉

  • ZADE says:

    Yep I’m an INFJ for sure now.

  • Adam Broadbent says:

    I too relate to both INFP and INFJ traits and can type as both. These types are both quite close too each other and all NF’s have common similarities and get on well together.
    INFP tends to be more laid back, open with ideas and a dreamer even a little childlike sometimes. Whereas INFJ is more focussed, outwardly closed and sensitive / thoughtful more business-like.
    This is what i see in others and myself anyway 😊

  • Preeti Priya says:

    Omfg!!!! This is me…

  • Transbutter says:

    Whoa this scared the crap out of me. How do you know me so well??

  • Lily says:

    Everyone of these describes me perfectly!!

  • Lily says:

    haha this is so weird but i have really similar interests as you, i really like animals, enjoy sciences a lot and i really like dancing. Must be INFJs

  • James Bondish says:

    Wow. I’m exactly this.

  • Clyde Seeger says:

    I tested out as an INFJ and yes, all of these points rang true with me as well. But I can’t help but think that they are general and vague enough that most anyone would agree that these described them as well.

    Darren Brown did an experiment where he handed a group an astrological reading that was supposedly customized for each person and were asked to read theirs and report back how correct it was. All came back saying it was 100% spot on and remarkably insightful it was so accurate. But there was not astrological chart readings. He just made up a bunch of bull, stuff that people like to hear about themselves and there was only one version. Everybody got the same “reading”.

    I once did a Tarot card reading for someone without knowing dick about Tarot card readings other than a friend gave me a reading over the phone one time. To be fair, I did know about cold reading and how that’s pulled off and that’s really all Tarot card reading is.

    I have a deck of Tarot cards, which is kind of a must, and from there I just winged it. I don’t know how they’re drawn or arranged or any of that stuff, but neither did the chick who was getting the reading, also a big plus.

    I arranged the cards in a cross pattern and began lifting the cards one at a time and whatever the picture was on the card I would say “Oh, this is the so and so card and it generally means such and such.” And those descriptions got better and more meaningful as we went on because she was giving me more information with each new card about was going on her life. Misses you just brush off and hits you really emphasize.

    She was astounded that I revealed so much about her and those in her life and what her concerns were etc. I was astounded that I pulled it off. It was easy.

    Yes, I did tell her when it was over that I had made it all up and didn’t know anything about Tarot cards. She didn’t believe me.

  • Thi Nguyễn says:

    who are you? how can u draw everything out while i can’t…

  • Esin Eyilik Muftuoglu says:

    One of the most accurate description on INFJ personality. Congrats!

  • Brandi Chammartin says:

    Perfect! I just wish I could find others INFJs and we could become great friends! Where are we all hiding??? 😊

  • Jackie P says:

    21 out 21 lol

  • This is 100% exactly the ENFJ. I related to absolutely every single item on this list except we aren’t shy and we don’t have trouble articulating our feelings. The INFJ is our kindred spirit… our slightly less outgoing cousin.

  • Tea says:

    This is creepy. Like, incredibly creepy. The part about self-improvement especially because I can’t remember a time in my life when I didn’t have a self-evolving project. A day without my checklist is a day unfulfilled. I just want to be the ideal.

  • Ashley Christa says:

    I thought I was INFP but when I read this I was getting chills because every one of these described me and I never realized it. I’m just like “wtf yes” when I read every one.

  • Tim Perry says:

    Dear INFJs who feel lost:

    Careers in design are the perfect fit for you. Architecture, urban design, industrial / product design, and UX design (user experience / user interface design). UX design is perhaps the most effortless fit, and requires no licenses or formal training.

    These fields let the INFJ indulge their creativity and empathy, LEVERAGE their talents to benefit many people, and see the results of their work impact people in positive ways.

    I studied engineering and now run an architectural acoustics business, but I worked briefly as a software UX / user interface designer. It was the most fascinating and natural fit for me. I loved it, and was naturally good at it.

    I highly encourage any INFJ to read the books “Don’t Make Me Think” and “Universal Principles of Design”.

    Design thinking is one of the secret areas where the INFJ can truly excel and be deeply fulfilled.

    Few other fields truly empower the INFJs empathy AND creativity at the same time.

    We live in a society filled with bad design. E.g., cities are designed around the car instead of the human, making the path of least resistance driving. This encourages people to develop unhealthy, unsustainable habits.

    Good design accepts that people are lazy and irrational, and seeks to create a path of least resistance that guides people into healthy, productive, benevolent outcomes.

    My adventures into UX design helped me discover that design is my core passion. I think many INFJs are not even thinking about this field, which is a shame, because it’s a perfect fit.

    Humanity has enough INFJ therapists. We need more INFJ designers.

  • Guillaume Richez says:

    I’m an INTP, I got almost all points…

    So I wonder… Am I an INTJ, are you INTPs, am I an INTJ-INTP hybrid or are you?

  • The Last Rose says:

    Number 15 is the story of my life. Great article!

  • Kuno Rojas says:

    Omg, every single trait listed here is exactly me!!! It’s like the creator of this list has been spying on me or something… lol

  • thunder says:

    I did my personality test a while ago. I was not sure if I have changed from INFJ to something else. Reading this made it certain for me that I am still an INFJ. 🙂

  • Natasha CT says:

    This is essentially my personal biography.

  • Lael Penner says:

    Some of my friends say I act differently sometimes.. when I am in a class I’m introvert, but afterwards, I’m extravert. It all depends on the people I guess. Most of the time I feel like people don’t know the real me. Like they think I am just a quiet and reserved person, but in reality, I can be quite different. Anyone else ever feel like this?

  • Geek says:

    Most of them. I’m an extrovert, specifically the ENTP personality type.

  • Matthew Moore says:

    Part of #19 is the only one that doesn’t really hold true for me. I know that I am an INFJ as I have done ample research and have even taken a type clarifier test. I enjoy planning to a certain extent, although I believe there should be room for interpretation. Although I do definitely need a goal to work towards. I just do not like making to-do lists.

  • Chynna Cotaoco says:

    apparently, i am all these 21 detailed descriptions.. no doubt of me being INFJ.

  • Konyin Aromolaran says:

    Relate to every single one of these, although all the tests I’ve been taking say I’m an INFP :/

  • areesha phulpoto says:

    Every single point accurately describes me 👍🏼

  • Catherine says:

    Still wondering what the secret of connecting with other people is, how to find like minded people etc as an INFJ. Any advice?
    Also, no. 21 can be difficult. Sometimes I have bad days- tired, ill, stressed etc. People are shocked and turn away, they don’t seem to accept that I’m human and need support sometimes. I can’t be ‘wise’ all the time.

  • Nanette Cormier says:

    Every single one! I’ve found my people!!!!

  • Johnny N says:

    Pretty wild reading, that’s for sure. Ironically I somehow came across personality types while doing some reading about some theoretical views about time and space, haha. Extremely interesting and practically nailed everything about me as a person.

  • Lucky_Da_Doggie says:

    I am an INFJ but my friends all think I am an extrovert o_0. The list describe me exactly it is scary

  • rosy300 says:

    i have done test 3 times and each time the results are INFP but everytime I read about INFJ’s I can totally relate and almost better than when I read about INFP.s. Can somebody be half and half or can we change in a short span of time like a few years?

  • rosy300 says:

    Have done the Myers Briggs test 3 times and each time I,m a INFP but I seem to relate better to an INFJ when I read about that personality. Can we be half and half or caN we change in a short period of time like a few years?

  • Kristin says:

    I’m really uncomfortable with how accurate this is lol

  • leoandcas says:

    I am exactly like this

  • MaxCafe says:

    Sounds just like me.

  • Mari D says:

    That’s 100% me, except for the point 21. It’s almost scaring to see how much it fits me. Probably we are all just robots in different prototypes. 🙂

  • Willeke says:

    If you want to know for sure if you’re an INFJ, just do the Myers-Briggs test. I did it 3 times over the past 20 years and was shocked to see I stayed an INFJ all this time.

  • Anisah Pattinson says:

    Why oh why! Absolutely this is me you’re describing. And it’s very energy draining but I can’t help it! This is so me! What should I do? I tried changing myself, knowing myself but I just can’t. I change but very temporarily.

  • Paper_Chase says:

    I think I’m right on the cusp of F and T. Too thin skinned for my own good!!!

  • Cate says:

    But it isn’t the rarest personality type. INTJ is the rarest personality type.

  • Najeeb Hasan says:

    Goodness! I could really relate to all of it…every word…though I thought i am an INTJ but it seems no

  • Gnrh says:

    Thank you. I really thought that I am weird and everything, but thank God, I am not alone.

  • ana cara-linda says:

    I’m a INFJ-T. It’s exactly like this.

  • Wendy Dyck says:

    OK not sure how everything fits because I CAN relate to all of this & feel it applies to me. How does it all fit? Have been diagnosed with bi-polar disorder 2 & I know that I am an empath. Guess I would like to know how it all fits together.

  • Delulu ako 🐰 says:

    Rarest of all personalities and then suddenly people in the comment section be like: “this is me!”🤣

    • Among the wolves says:

      I laughed out loud reading this. I took the Myers-Briggs in college, and I wish I was not an INJF.

  • Cecelia Rose LaPointe says:

    Being alone is healing as I am drained by other humans.

  • Dan Caveye says:

    unbelievably accurate in describing me, and i even randomly scanned a book on personality types in order to give a close friend my perception or opinion of whether or not he fit in a certain category. so i read the book biased and discounted some of the facts that described him, as to not upset him.. i also have noticed that i often use my mistakes or transgressions prior to correcting certain people, so they dont think im trying to put them down in any way, even though they may ask for my “wise or enlightened, and honest opinion” sometimes “truth” does more harm than good , and often is misinterpreted as judgement. or comparison

  • Nari. G says:

    Yes to 95% of this. This was great to read. I wish I could meet people like this in real life. Feels like everyone around me is just busy gossiping about each other and talking about really mundane things like make-up (I’m not a make-up person lol) – why can’t we discuss books or time travel or the supernatural? Why is everyone around me so unbothered..

  • Artur Budziński says:

    I thought I was INFP, but nahhh, this sounds much more like me! :3

  • Kim says:

    Finally understand I am not alone… and not an alien trapped in a human body with no recollection of a previous life…

  • Stephan Badgett says:

    Yes! I work as a marriage and family therapist and love to take long, solo rides on my Harley. A singer/actor through grad school, I can be both fun and gregarious but only when I choose (mood of room). #19 & #20…and all the rest, were dead on!

  • Cantremember Thename says:

    I seem to be transitioning from INTJ to INFJ..not that there’s a huge difference between the two, but I’m definitely becoming more interested in the realms of feelings and what others think, believe, etc., and losing some of the interest I once had in cold hard data and analysis. I think I also just believe in my own intuition more than ever..because like #9 says, I know I’m not always right, but I am generally able to get pretty close to the heart of whatever matter is at hand.

    And that’s enough talking myself up. Thanks for the great article!

  • parkhous says:

    FINALLY. I have landed on Planet “I Am No Longer Alone”.

    For my entire life I have felt that I just don’t quite fit in on this planet – I even moved (alone) to another continent to try to fit in / find my kin. I’ve been through various trials and tribulations in my younger years / childhood – hell, we all have – spent decades putting it down to a variety of reasons as to why I “am like I am” which I can now see would make perfect sense in the “medical / physchological western world” where there is always a factual answer with data. data, data to back it up. The acceptable answers. But no. Its’ none of that. It’s because I am an INFJ.

    I’ve just read the “21 points” and the tears were flowing with me utterly incapable of stopping them.

    So, now I’m not alone – how do I connect with others like me? Bearing in mind we are somewhat reserved and protective of our inner selves – how do we reach out authentically?

    I live in the East Bay, San Fran area. I’m English.

    Is there anyone out there?

    Huge hugs and warmth to all.


  • Bestisstill2come says:

    This describes me so well. Number 5 jumped out at me. I rarely offer advice to others but instead focus on listening and empathising. In my opinion advice is overrated as it’s delivered by someone who usually hasn’t walked in the shoes of the person they are offering it to.

    In my experience, the key to getting the most from life as as INFJ is to focus on making as much use of the talents that we’ve been given. In today’s noisy, distracted, uncertain and superficial world, there is a real need for the calmness, wisdom, empathy and depth of thought that INFJ’s have in abundance.