Why I Like Introverts More Than Extroverts (From an Extrovert)

an introvert and an extrovert

Introverts skip to the topics that really matter. With them, there is no having to drone on about the weather.

Introverts can get a bad rep. They can sometimes be painted as socially awkward, aloof homebodies that would sooner eat paint than talk to a stranger. But the dictionary definition of introversion is wrong — in actuality, they are a goldmine of hidden strength, creativity, and relatability. 

In fact, as an extrovert, I’m utterly fascinated by the rich inner worlds that my introvert friends inhabit. Sure, if I want a definite plus-one to hit up a big party with, I’ll call on a fellow extrovert. But, all in all, I find I much prefer the lovable quirks and beautiful minds of my introverted friends.

Since being an introvert is largely thankless, introverts are much less likely to hear how truly appreciated they are. But, rest assured, we extroverts do see and hear what you’re all about (even if we’re doing most of the talking).

Here are seven reasons I appreciate my introvert friends (and I bet you’ll be able to relate).

7 Reasons Extroverts Appreciate Their Introvert Friends

1. They have a wide variety of deep interests.   

Ask an introvert what they do in their free time and you’re likely to hear about their current engineering project, in-the-works novel, ongoing research on ancient Rome, or latest art masterpiece.

From teaching themselves to code to undertaking a new photography project, introverts take their hobbies to the next level. They have their own unique interests that are much more fun to talk about than the typical ones, such as watching sports or who was at what party.

2. They are authentic and will let you see their true personality (if they’re comfortable with you).

There is a reason introverts are not open and chatty with every person they meet like extroverts are. Introverts know who they are and know they are not going to click with every single person they come across. They don’t consider everyone their friend — and they’re okay with that. True to themselves, they refuse to change who they are to appeal to the masses. 

Some extroverts would don a mask or social persona at the drop of a hat if it meant fitting in or making another friend, but introverts know better. Of course, they will let you see their true personalities if they feel comfortable with you, if you “get” them, and are in their inner circle — but you have to earn it. They are not going to pretend to like you or give you courtesy laughs to get you to like them. They are totally fine with saving the more colorful side of their personality for their close friends and family. 

3. They are less judgmental and appreciate people for their character, not their social status.

Introverts simply do not have the energy for hypocritical social ladders or judging people based on superficial measures. While many extroverts spend their time and resources forging social connections and climbing the ranks of the social ladder, introverts could literally not care less. 

Instead of seeing people for their social appeal, introverts appreciate people for their character, beliefs, and personality. They’ll want to get to know you for you, not for who you know or what you do or just to add another person to their social rolodex. If you are having a bad hair day, have something on your shirt, or say something dumb, an introvert will not judge you for it. 

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4. They embrace their individuality.

Introverts seem to be all about being their own person and embracing their individuality. I think this is because they spend plenty of time alone — and, because of this, they are familiar with their own opinions and interests. And since they’re deep thinkers, there’s no rivaling introverts when it comes to having an innovative opinion on something or a unique area of expertise. These individualized interests ensure that they are a blast to talk to and a very well-realized individual. Once you get an introvert talking about something they’re passionate about, get ready to listen…

5. They have a hidden wild side.

If you think introverts are quiet, calm, and shy all the time, you clearly haven’t seen one when they are comfortable and around their close friends. When introverts are among people they trust, they can be the silliest, loudest, most unhinged people you have ever met.

The transformation can be baffling. An introvert can go from not saying a single word the whole day at work to talking a lot about something they’re interested in or even doing something surprising, like karaoke or improv. It’s all about the right circumstances with the right people. One thing’s for sure: They’ll keep you on your toes. 

6. They’re the best people to have deep conversations with.

I have spent whole days with my extrovert friends without ever getting past the small talk level… the whole time. Extroverts are fluent in small talk, which can lead to trouble and never moving on from shallow topics.

Introverts, however, do not have this problem. Some are just as proficient in small talk as their extrovert peers, but the vast majority hate it. This avoidance of small talk is a strength, as they talk about what really matters to them: their hopes, dreams, fears, insecurities, and stories. And yours, too.

Introverts skip to the topics that really matter within the first few minutes of talking. Congratulations! With introverts, there is no having to drone on about the weather, economy, and personal lives of people you barely know before getting into the meat of a conversation. 

7. They have the best taste in people and make for loyal friends.

There is nothing special about being friends with an extrovert; after all, they are friends with everyone. The only prerequisites to be friends with a social butterfly are breathing and having a pulse. (I kid, but…)

Introverts, however, are a different story — they are insanely loyal to a small number of people. They are not ones to replace their friends or change social groups every couple months. They stick by the same people. So they have to make sure to pick those people wisely. If an introvert lets you in their friend circle, you should feel flattered. They don’t do this for just anyone. And believe me, my introvert friends, I appreciate it. And you.

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